Saturday, September 10, 2005

Fcukc yoo, Omasa

Back when i took my first steps in the "information highway" (which, incidentally, was back when it was called exactly that), i found all my worrisome misconceptions of this devil's invention instantly confirmed: all those "enlarge your penis" and viagra e-mails surely meant some sort of spy-cam peeked at my very personal life,unfortunately one of those (very few, no matter what you 'll hear from my ex) "it's the first time that happens to me, hon, i swear" nights, fed the facts to those fiendish ad organisations, and they are luring me to the world of "improving my manhood".
Than i (thought) i wizened up: increased sophistication to the ways of the web only led to more sophisticated misconceptions: when the "shy sluts getting fucked hard" started giving way to things like "Shy Sluts gtteting fucekkd hard" i thought that what was happening was spammers were deliberately misspelled words to get past spam filters.Far from it.
I finally put 2+2 together.
It's another evil plot by "the Terrorists", those elusive dark skinned bastards set to destroy Our Ways, jealous as they are of everything that makes the West proud of drowning our people in more technologically advanced waters (did those thirld world Indonesians have toxic thingies in their Tsunami? of course not!)
This evil plot is aimed against our proud english language.The elaborate plan is to make you mentally connect sexual pleasure with bad english.The grammar will become progressively worse, until, without realising, you 'll end up getting sexually aroused reading extensive passages from the Koran.Then you ''ll have become one of Them.
Nice try, Osama, but you know what? Your poorly conceived plan is doomed,mothufacka*,'cause you left out one small but significant detail:
You never did solve the problem of my erection.

*(see? it;s getting to me already).


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